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Date and time notation in Japan has historically followed the Japanese calendar and the nengō system of counting years.
At the beginning of the Meiji period, Japan switched to the Gregorian calendar on Wednesday, 1 January 1873, but for many domestic and regional government paperwork, the Japanese year is retained.
Japanese business and the people have also adopted various conventions in accordance with their use of kanji, the widespread use of passenger trains, and other aspects of daily life.
I can only only speak from a man’s point of view, but to me it seems many western men have a misconception about the dating culture here.
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Maybe, as you say, it would be better to address these smaller issues as and when they come up. Anyway, there are actually a ton of us westerners/other non-Japanese married to Japanese men, including a small community of us on City-Cost.
Although we could end up spending a lot of time doing that! I know of several American women who married Japanese men around 40 years ago, despite being judged like crazy.